I have to say that I’m a little bit envious of femsubs. It’s not that I desire to be female or to be in a Mf type of relationship, but that world is just so drastically different that I can’t help but feel a slight bit of envy.
In the past year I have interacted with more femsubs in the blogosphere than ever before and with a lot more regularly since the days when I still attended munches with a local BDSM group.
If anything, the envy comes from the fact that there are so many different types of sub/Dom relationships that exist in Mf that just rarely if ever happen in Fm. In a way, it’s sort of like telling one side, “oh, you can be anything if you set your mind to it. You can be a doctor, lawyer, or whatever you want to be.” On the other side, it’s “oh, you’re a man. You can be a butler.”
I know this is a horribly biased over-simplification, but sometimes it feels this way. Don’t get me wrong, I am completely down for a life of loving service and devotion, but I have to wonder if there was only one path available to femsubs if they would also carry the stigma of being “wankers.”
e.g. A femsub little finds a Daddy Dom that will care for them in such a way that both the little and submissive needs are taken care of. A malesub little pays $250 an hour and is a pariah.
I guess it’s just strange to me that in many Mf relationships it draws out the nurturing and protective sides of men, but with Fm, it feels almost like the opposite. In clarification of that last sentence, I do believe that Dommes are loving and caring, it’s just in a very different way. It feels almost as if dominant women do not want to have any maternal instinct when it comes to dealing with subs. That is understandable on many levels, I just find it interesting.
I’m not trying to judge and say that any one way is right or wrong, it just fascinates me how different the endgames are.