More adventures in chastity: Holy Trainer V2

More adventures in chastity: Holy Trainer V2

Wow, it’s been a long time since I wrote anything of a chastity device review (January 2012).

This past week I was able to get a good deal on a (legit) Holy Trainer v2 chastity device.  Nearly everything I had read about this device has been positive with a handful of gripes about security, which is bound to happen with anything that isn’t a full belt or doesn’t involve a piercing.

I’ve touched on it a bit before but I own a Houdini knock off, a CB-2000, CB-3000, CB-6000, and CB-6000S (that I purchased when they made it available cage only).  Also, as much as I hate talking about my junk, this will only be helpful to others if I put it out there.

Basically, every part of my sexual anatomy does NOT want to work with chastity devices:

  1. Uncircumcised.
  2. I’m a “grower” not a “show-er”.  The magnitude is in the realm of 3-4X increase.
  3. I have an extremely high and tight scrotum.
  4. Asymmetric testicles (one is bigger).
  5. I have a layer of baby fat on my pelvis that has never gone away (even when I was fit/trim).  It is sort of like having the penis sticking through a 1/2″ thick pillow.  The base sits below the surface and if you press it down in one spot, the other side will rise.  This skin never “toughens up.”

Combine all these factors together and you have the perfect storm of wasted money and frustration from devices that don’t fit.  I enjoy the exquisite frustration of chastity but I have never found something that I could wear comfortably for more than a few hours.  Most of the other experiments ended either with a bruised testicle from being able to pull through in a bad way or if I was able to configure them to avoid that, they inevitably led to wounds on the scrotum or pelvic skin (#5).

I really really really wanted the Holy Trainer to work.

I have only positive things to say about the ring.  Unlike the CB-X000 line devices that have a perfectly round ring, the Holy Trainer’s ring is contoured in its shape to actually fit the male anatomy and is very smooth.  If you are new to chastity you will likely get some burn from skin stretching, but, wow, what a difference this makes in the chastity experience.

The cage portion sits at a decently low angle and the gap between the ring and cage is very similar to the CB-X000 line using spacers on the narrower end of the spectrum.  Initial comfort was excellent, but the cage design also ended up being the reason for the device not working for me.

The top back edge of the cage portion extends slightly beyond the back of the ring.  While the edge isn’t sharp… it’s definitely not rounded and contoured in a friendly way if you have #5.  The end result is that due to #3 and #5 the back edge of the cage does touch the skin and due to #4, it would pull the corner in an uncomfortable way.  The end result is that the skin would actually pull itself over the corner and lead to an unnatural level of pull and discomfort of the skin on that side.  Within 15 minutes the area would burn.  After 45 minutes any part of the scrotum on that side was painful to the touch.  Attempts to “pad” the area just seemed to disperse the pressure and not actually solve the problem.  I’m guessing it was pressing on some nerves/circulation spots.  After ~8 30-minute trials I noticed the skin at that spot was getting very tender and staying that way for a couple of hours after removing it.

The end result is that it will not work unless I were to heavily modify the cage portion and seeing as the only B I received in K-12 was in shop class, that isn’t in the cards.

In order to give a more complete review I will talk about a couple of other aspects.

The lock is both amazing and infuriating.  No more padlock rattle.  The locking mechanism sits neatly out of the way.  That is good.  The downside is that to get everything to line up was difficult.  Due to #5, holding the cage in place while trying to get the little insert in perfectly was maddening at times.  It would occasionally flip its tab just as I was about to insert it.  At other times it would go in through 2 of the 3 pieces it needs to pass through but then would not want to make a clean contact into the 3rd section.  I would end up having to remove the cage and reset it.  A handful of other times it would get into all 3, but was just off enough to where it couldn’t be locked.

As maddening as this lock might seem, compare it to a CB-6000 and its 27430928 tiny hard plastic parts that all want to pinch you while you try to get the lock in place and it seems sort of silly to complain about it.  The Holy Trainer V2 is 2 pieces + the lock.  I experimented with a few of the CB-X000’s last night and found myself swearing as I dropped one of the spacers and found myself crawling around on the floor with a flashlight for 5 minutes.  Advantage Holy Trainer.

An odd byproduct of lack of a padlock is that the Holy Trainer doesn’t have anything that can be used to attach a leash or chain… ya know… in case that ever comes up.

Overall, I think this is an excellent device… for someone other than me.  Aside from that pinch point I would say this is significantly more comfortable than the other plastic devices on the market that I have used.  Unfortunately that pinch point is enough of a factor to keep this from being a viable option for me in the long-run.

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