447. Thoughts on Truth, Honesty, Kindness, and Reality

Is it possible to have a fetish for truth, honesty, and reality? I grew up in a region that is known for its long-standing cultural roots of passive-aggressiveness.  False niceties are a way of life.  Be kind, even if it means you have to lie about it.  Wait to talk shit until you are in …

446. Thoughts on Consent (2018)

These are just my thoughts... and not something that should be referenced for educational purposes.  As I have been active in the community over the years, often working in conjunction with educational groups, one thing that I never really write about in its standard form is consent.  For a lot of people, consent is paramount …

445. Psychological Dismantling

Note:  I chose an example that is limited to F/m as my primary example in order to avoid trigger topics, but this is applicable to most types of D/s. Psychological dismantling is the term that I use for the process a dominant uses when they key in on a sub's triggers and traps them in …

444. Thoughts on D/s and Life

For me, D/s is not in my present.  It is in my future.  With that in mind, I still see my life as being built around D/s.  I see the self that I portray here as my real self and the rest of my life as an act that I perform while I wait for …

443. Is D/s your life?

A comment from Nora on my last post brought up an idea that I had almost written about back in December but chose not to.  The topic at hand is whether or not people see D/s as their "real" life. This is actually a very important topic.  Keeping in mind that everyone has their own …

442. Thoughts on Thick Skin

My post on extreme fantasy had me thinking today about why I get bothered by critical responses to certain parts of myself and my submission.  Should I have thicker skin and be able to shrug off negativity? While pondering this question over lunch I realized that the answer is a lot more complicated than I …

441. Thoughts on Thematic Analysis

During a conversation with a friend tonight, it dawned on me that very few people really grasp the symbols and themes that are at work below their kink interests and fetishes.  This seems especially prevalent in those who did their learning through the BDSM community.  If you ask them what they like or what "does …

440. Thoughts on Extreme Fantasy

As I am in a down period, I have again found that the only type of kinky thoughts that I have are of the really dark fantasy arena that I wrote about in posts 275 and 406. I have had a couple of conversations on this with some friends and I've come to realize just …

439. A Cloudy Head

The state that I reach where I find myself blocked from my emotions, submissive feelings, and the like I will often refer to as feeling cloudy.  It's not that I stop having thoughts, I just stop having complete thoughts, if that makes any sense. If any of you have ever been on general anesthetic for …

438. Another Update

Well, I decided to go ahead and post all of the drafts that I had planned to scrap.  Post 434 is the only one that I really wrote with any feeling behind it.  The others... didn't really resonate within me but I posted them anyways. I haven't been able to feel submissive lately and that …