491. More submissive mental space and swimming pools fun

Some recent talks have brought me back to thinking about submissive mental space and various other spaces and I wanted to write a little bit more about it now.  As I often do, I will be referring to submissive mental space as “subspace” in an attempt to take back a word that has had its meaning changed over the past decade.

In the past I have frequently compared submissive mental space to a swimming pool.  When I enter submissive mental space, I enter the pool.  The depth corresponds roughly to “how submissive I feel.”  Entering the pool can happen in a number of ways.  I can enter the shallow end and wade in.  I can jump in at any point.  I can be pushed in by someone else at any point.  Once in the pool, stimuli (both physical and mental) can drag me deeper or pull me to the shallows.  Certain stimuli can even launch me out of the pool.  When I change depths it affects my preferences, thought processes, instincts, and desires.  The deeper I go, the more submissive I become.

I believe that most subs that have a subspace work in a somewhat similar way.


Figure A is an approximation of my own personal pool.  In a shallow space, things progress rather slowly with a gentle slope gradually immersing me deeper.  When I reach a certain depth, the descent happens more rapidly and I am more likely to slide deeper with ease, often quickly traversing the middle section into the depths.  At a certain point, I find myself in deep and while stimuli may take me deeper, it happens a lot slower than it did in the middle section.

Each sub’s pool will be unique.  They will vary in depth.  The slope of the grade will be uniquely theirs.  Their comfort zone in regards to the depth will also vary.  Some subs fear the deep while others wish to live there.  I believe it is fairly safe to say that when in the pool, the sub will feel submissive and be aroused and exposure to their kinks, fetishes, and other triggers will help take them deeper.

Figure B is an approximation of what the pool looks like in regards to slavespace.  For those who are unfamiliar with the term, slavespace is a mental space frequently associated with extremely deep submission and usually a place that subs who are cut out for an M/s relationship can access.  It is a bit dissociative, with a nearly complete erasure of self that allows a sub to exist as if they are an object, possession, or property.

As you can see, the pool is really deep but has only one space.  From my experiences, slavespace is almost binary:  you are in it or you are out of it.  Once in that space, you can’t really become slightly more or slightly less slave-like.

The reason why I took the time to badly draw this out and write a post on a topic I have discussed 39 times before is that I believe that the Figure B pool can describe a number of different spaces.  I believe that fetishists experience a “space” that is similar to this when exposed to their fetish.  I believe some subs have an extremely dark space (one sub I know thinks this is their Freudian id-space) that functions in this way as well.  I believe that some littles experience their little space similarly to Figure B.

I hope people find this interesting.

24 thoughts on “491. More submissive mental space and swimming pools fun

  1. Thank you for drawing me a picture! Not only do i love drawings, but it really does help me understand the differences and the depth of the space in figure B. So glad i have you and that we can talk freely about this stuff!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Also i do agree that little space is more like figure B, in that when i am in i am in and when i am not i am not, but i also have a theory that my little space and sub space are the same pool, so it gives me something to think about.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Do you think that you can only be in slave space or not in any form of subspace? Dominants often have relationship modes with their submissives: slave mode, service mode, and partner mode as a way to adapt to the demands of public and semi-private living.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Dave.

      I know that I have several spaces that I shift between. In addition to subspace and a form of slavespace I also have a nurturing/supportive type as well as a more traditionally romantic side (as well as my normal public persona). The spaces that I do not associate with any form of submission I can shift between at will. The submissive-type spaces sometimes require outside factors to initiate them. I consider my slavespace separate from my subspace and it is a one or the other and never both type of situation. I hope that makes sense. I am rather familiar with the varying roles and adaptations that are required with D/s relationships as I have lived within them for years.

      Take care.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I think this is an accurate depiction. When HD pushes me to slavespace, that’s all there is for me until he pulls me out of it again. When I am in submissive space, there is much more variation and the transition is much more gradual. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I have found that I can get out of it on my own, but the resulting mental space is less stable. Or at least less overall content. I’m more prone to dropping and feeling lethargic if I am left to drag myself out. The transition is much smoother and more positive if he pulls me out rather than me clawing my way out. Fortunately he almost always does.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I love your thoughts on subspace. It would be interesting to get guidance on how subspace training should work for those aiming to get deep into subspace. Triggers for getting in, but how to stay there after a hard day of work, during tiredness? There are some training manuals but what should be the (possible) few underlying principles which should/could be applied? Did you ever think about these questions? The perfect subspace training guide…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you.

      I have thought about this before. Unfortunately everyone’s sub mental space is fairly individual and unique. The triggers vary greatly from person to person but generally fall within the symbolic characteristics of kinks and fetishes and how they relate to a person’s vulnerability. Many kinks are linked to greater themes and often identifying and exploring the themes are where that information falls.

      I have struggled with reaching space after a stressful day but I have found that rituals and dominance can take me there.

      Take care.


  5. An interesting insight into the experience from the sub perspective. Some food for thought about how to create or use different triggers depending on the role to be played. I intuitively knew that a sub needed to be led deeper while a slave would be put there, but I hadn’t consciously used it or applied it to other spaces.

    Liked by 1 person

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