This post has been due for a while now.
Over the past 4 years or so, I had a the sense that my style of submission was on the verge of extinction. This wasn’t because of a shortage of subs that submit in the way that I do, but more so because of a shift in the climate of the community and a diminishing percentage of Dommes that would find my style of submission attractive.
It has made me quite happy over the past year to discover that this demographic is not gone. They are alive and well. They are under-represented in the blogging community and guides and resources. They have to hide themselves a bit to blend in with their peers. It’s common for them to feel “different” than the other Dommes they encounter. I call these types, dark Dommes.
When I classify someone as a dark Domme, they are usually someone that is an intense sadist with a taste for both emotional and physical sadism, as well as a desire to have significant control over a sub. What tends to make the dark Dommes stand out is that their driving force comes from the desire to experience and enjoy the sub’s reactions above all else.
These Dommes rarely have a favorite toy or a favorite activity. They very likely have a favorite reaction from the sub and will do whatever it takes to get it. They want to see the quivering of the flesh under their touch. They want to soak in the heavy breathing that occurs when fear and anticipation collide. They want to see the muscles stiffen and the body squirm in a vain effort to avoid pain. They want to watch a face melt into a deep frown and the eyes well up with tears. They want to hear a deep voice break into a meek squeal as it begs for respite. They want to devour souls.
A dark Domme’s favorite activity is to make those things happen. A dark Domme’s favorite toy is whatever in the moment will make those things happen.
The dark Dommes I know all temper their desires to fit into the realm of acceptable behaviors. They hide the depth of their sadism and the darkest nature of their fantasies. They rarely share these with anyone, for fear that they will be perceived as a monster.
Having found a number of these Dommes over the past year and a half makes me exceedingly happy. Knowing that they are out there makes me feel less obsolete. It makes me feel like there is a target demographic that might desire a broken sub like me. It makes me feel like I am not someone with unrealistic fantasies that no one would ever want to be with.
I have been told that contrary to my own belief, that I am rather rare for the level of vulnerability I am willing to go to. I still have trouble believing that, but it makes me feel good to hear it.