Functional Roleplay – Fake It Till Ya Make It

Submissy's post on roleplay today inspired some thoughts. I have known a number of people who are very anti-roleplay.  They see it as fake.  False.  Pretend.  Impure.  Pure fantasy.  Catering to the wrong desires.  Etc. I get it, but I don't get it.  You don't truly know something until you have experienced it.  You have … Continue reading Functional Roleplay – Fake It Till Ya Make It

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Thinking more about Submissive Mental Space

Submissive mental space (or subspace, as I prefer to refer to it), is one of my favorite topics to discuss.  I believe that it serves such an integral place in submission and the healthy maintenance of a D/s relationship, yet it gets talked about so infrequently as a whole.  I have asked the question of … Continue reading Thinking more about Submissive Mental Space

Thoughts on Submissive vs. Slave

Last week I wrote about submissive vs. bottom.  This week I have decided to tackle the topic of submissives and slaves. Back when I entered the lifestyle, there was a pretty firm distinction between submissive and slave.  The available resources back then were still heavily rooted in old guard definitions and my first Domme took … Continue reading Thoughts on Submissive vs. Slave

Thoughts on Contexts and Embarrassment

A recent conversation with a blogging friend has made me realize just how obsessed I am with explaining myself.  I find myself constantly unable to share something without needing to link it to all parts involved.  By itself, it is too embarrassing and shameful for me to face.  By itself... out of context... what would … Continue reading Thoughts on Contexts and Embarrassment

The Struggles of Emotional Masochism

I have to believe that emotional masochism is one of the most difficult things in BDSM to cope with, understand, and communicate about.  Trying to describe it often feels shameful.  This can be a challenge for those who don't understand it because it is a struggle to communicate.  Hell, a lot of emotional masochists suck … Continue reading The Struggles of Emotional Masochism

She Has the Power to Create and Reshape Reality

My last two posts, A Pragmatic View from a single male submissive and Small Doubts seem to have gotten a bit of discussion going both in comments and via private contact.  A couple of discussions today found me wanting to elaborate more upon this and how it affects things in the D/s world in general. … Continue reading She Has the Power to Create and Reshape Reality