497. Thoughts on Experience Levels on both sides of the slash

There is another topic that has been lurking around in my brain for the past month or two and is quite relevant with the mentoring that I have been doing this year that I mentioned in my last post. I haven't encountered too many available subs out there with a highly-refined and evolved sense of …

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496. Wednesday Ramblings on subs and Dommes

I had originally planned on writing a follow-up post to my last post but after some deliberation and conversation with others I decided against it.  While the content of this post may be somewhat related, it is not what I had originally considered writing. This year has been a very busy one for me in …

495. Thoughts on other subs

I really haven't been posting much about a lot of the goings on that have been happening in my life lately.  I have been busy.  Very busy.  I have been regularly attending 4-5 different munch groups as well as spending a lot of time with people I have met.  It's quite a bit different than …

494. Explaining “The Assignment”

Sweetgirl's latest post talked about an exercise that I frequently encourage for subs.  It is something that I encouraged her to do early on and it is something that I recommend for subs that are newer or are in relationships and looking to take D/s to the next level.  I thought that it would be …

493. You can’t make this up…

Sometimes I worry that I am too harsh with my criticisms of the often clumsy approaches that sub men make within this lifestyle.  Thankfully, I have Domme friends that send me things like this: If you really read it closely, you can almost pinpoint the exact spot where he changes gears, shifting from, "This is …

492. Service Term Creation: Compelled Service

I was reflecting upon a few conversations I have had recently that brought me to write the post 487. Service: Thoughts on What they say vs. What they mean and I had a couple of thoughts regarding how we communicate about service.  I do hope some of these terms manage to catch on. I came …

491. More submissive mental space and swimming pools fun

Some recent talks have brought me back to thinking about submissive mental space and various other spaces and I wanted to write a little bit more about it now.  As I often do, I will be referring to submissive mental space as "subspace" in an attempt to take back a word that has had its …

490. Thoughts on Uniqueness and Conformity

Something that I have had to deal with a little bit in my local excursions into our groups here is the notion that many of my ideas and thoughts about D/s fall outside the norm.  Those who have followed me for a long time are probably used to the topics that I write about and …

489. Thoughts upon me, the submissive

The history of my life has been one where I have never felt desirable nor attractive.  I have always been different.  Different in such a way that the difference would be the characteristic that stood out the most.  Different was bad.  I would have to be twice as good to be considered half as good.  …

488. 5-Month Reflections upon my return to the local community

It was roughly 12 years ago that I left the local BDSM community due to the hateful drama, petty squabbles, and how that manifested itself in people's behaviors.  It was an experience that had born fruit, but had also soured and caused me to recoil deeply.  I didn't know who to trust.  It was easier …