Relationship Evolution and Plateaus

This post is a response to a question I was asked about some comments I left. I have written upon these subjects in the past quite a bit on my Blogger blog but I’m going to write about them again. All relationships change over time because the people involved in the relationships change. In D/s …

Why isn’t there more writing about the mental aspects of D/s?

Why isn't there more writing about the mental aspects of D/s? I find this completely puzzling as there are often carefully crafted relationship dynamics in place with the goal of keeping a sub twisting in deep subspace and a Domme maintaining a heightened Domspace.  I find it fascinating how people manage to keep a sub …

An Expectation of Service

I have been thinking a lot about the D/s lifestyle lately and after giving a couple of subs some advice on how to attract a Dominant woman for a long-term relationship and I realize just how far removed I am in my mind from the realm of BDSM relationships where kink is defined and the …

More Chastity 2017: The Good, The Bad, and The Meh

I'll start with the bad.  After the Holy Trainer proved problematic I got a deal on a Strict Gate, hoping the soft back "tab" would alleviate the issues that I have with the Holy Trainer.  Due to my high and tight scrotum, previous generations of silicon devices just didn't look promising.  If you struggle to …

D/s vs. Codependency

There are times when I wonder if I'm actually codependent.  If you do a search for codependent or codependency it will spit out a great number of results that paint this as an emotional disorder.  Here are a few examples I copied/pasted from the search results: "Codependency is characterized by a person belonging to a …

Click 2017 Part 2

I got asked privately to elaborate a bit more on what goes on internally when it comes to what I talked about in the post Revisiting Click. Basically, I believe that the differences between having a choice and no choice when it comes to obedience corresponds to different mental states and levels of subspace.  How …

Revisiting “Click”: 2017 Edition

Years ago I remember making a post about how the clicking shut of a lock triggered a good bit of meaning to me.  Back then I remember my thoughts on it were mostly that it made me feel safe, protected, and valued (e.g. you put a lock on an expensive bike).  This pertained to what …