551. Failing to Balance the Two Spaces

Something that I have been struggling with lately is the battle between my two submissive mental spaces. There is my service-side. There is my emotional masochist side. Each of these spaces has a distinctly different feel to them and an entirely separate set of preferences, ideals, and philosophies that govern them. My service side wants …

540. Today’s Thoughts on Service Submission

So I am attending a Femdom discussion munch tonight on service.  I've written a lot about this in the past and at some point I may do a write-up/Guide, but for now, I just wanted to write something brief-ish to gather my thoughts for the discussion tonight. In BDSM communities, service submission often falls through …

520. Thoughts on Service and Servitude

For the duration of my blogging "career," I have encouraged subs to try to become more service-oriented.  To me, service-oriented submission is to find fulfillment in their submission in the ways that benefit a Domme and provide enhancements to her life and lifestyle. When I first got started as a sub, I was more of …

494. Explaining “The Assignment”

Sweetgirl's latest post talked about an exercise that I frequently encourage for subs.  It is something that I encouraged her to do early on and it is something that I recommend for subs that are newer or are in relationships and looking to take D/s to the next level.  I thought that it would be …

492. Service Term Creation: Compelled Service

I was reflecting upon a few conversations I have had recently that brought me to write the post 487. Service: Thoughts on What they say vs. What they mean and I had a couple of thoughts regarding how we communicate about service.  I do hope some of these terms manage to catch on. I came …

487. Service: Thoughts on What they say vs. What they mean

Welcome to attempt #11 at finishing this post. I have been helping and mentoring some newer Dommes again and taking part in some local discussion groups and the topic of service has come up quite a bit.  Well, sort of.  Most of the time the topic revolves around service and how one party's definition of …

213. Creating your own service-oriented submissive mental space

EDIT:  So I got sick this weekend and I've had a fever all day.  Apparently writing with a fever makes me sound like an arrogant douche bag... or at least that's my own personal impression of the last post or two that I made.  My apologies if either of them came off that way, my …

182. Thoughts on Idealism vs. Reality

It took me years to craft a set of submissive ideals that represented the type of sub that I wanted to be and was capable of providing the lifestyle that I could both promise and deliver upon.  It took me another couple of years to condition and adapt myself mentally to not only be content …

176. Thoughts on Domestic Service

There are times when I wish I was one of those people that was a neat freak.  You know, those types that get off on making everything clean and organized.  I am not one of those people.  I'm not dirty or filthy, but I'm more about not making a mess than I am about cleaning. …

110. Domestic Service: Adulting for Two

Yesterday's post on An Expectation of Service was inspired by a conversation with a Domme friend and it got a bit twisted up as I ended up covering why I recommend every single sub to be willing to perform domestic service as well as the way that I fetishize it in my own head.  I …